lovely together; I love you

Sunday, December 31, 2006Y

colour attractions. new yr cancelled. going all holy?.

pink- makes me misz him
purple- misz him moree.
black- secure.
white- happy.
brown- sexy?.
polka dotts- attraction!.

yes, my colours attract?! haha.

new yr plan cancelled. going all holy. church? i kno. fucked up ritee? ..

xoxomee.

6:08:00 PM

boredom. haha.

My converse = lovee.

xoxo*ness. where were you?.

i need you. dont say you lovee me. just stay with me for a while.
a taste of the bitter*ness of lovee. it hurts.

"don't love unless you expect pain."
advicee frm xoxo*mee. x)

12:19:00 AM

Saturday, December 30, 2006Y

Polka dotties.hairbands.music.sms'n.teddy&i.

teddy is such a sweetheart. he said he wud cry me a ocean?! hahaha. why is dt sweet btw.=)

my lovee for polka dotties is growin.
My sassy-classy hairbands aree flooding my room.
music box. oh music box. you play the right songs at the right time.
he is such a dear dear friend. i thank gawd i found a special buddie likee him.
i hatee my bs goin out wid "my" worst enemy. but i dont really caree i never stay enemys wid them for long.

"whatever you say babes. i REFUSE to removee his ring frm my finger =)."
tinee* is such an ass!. i dislikee her. but then again she'll come arnd soon .
"honey, why you calling me so latee." greg. lovee you bro!.

new yrs comin soon. i need to go out. i misz my friends. i hatee studying.
not suree if im goin to klcc or clubbin wid my kak.
meimei nat is such a sweetie. she sent me a really cutee "goodnight" msg. and i lovee her for atleast thinkin of me [:

xoxomee.

10:43:00 PM

lips of an angel. a song i cant get off my mind.
let it rain?! another one frm my music box!

im so bored. i gotta stop sms'n him. but i dont want.
im suree ill causee something. and dear?! don't talk abt "it" anymoree. i dont want. kay?

i misz greg&keith loads! i prefer not to "show" anything abt them cos they're all minee. My oh-so-sexy bros!
my punkie-skater boys?. i drool over them but i lust after them =)

"its really good to hear your voice saying my name, it sounds so sweet."
but " honey, why you calling me so latee?" i sang dt to greg yesterday and he laughed at me![:

boohoo. i need you babee, i want movies. walk in the park. crying on ure shoulder. laugh at the most funniest things. sharing ice-creams?. roses dt comes in a bunch* words frm mak lia. kiszes in the rain?. dancing in the dark. Yes! my fantasy?! one day. one sweet and lovely day. my reality =)

greg! come homee soon!. i need all the abovee excpt the kisses in the rain* talk abt memories ey greg? haha.remember when u acted gay and tried to hook ureself up wid a "lala boy". you really freaked him out. and rememebr wen dt weird dude was stalkin us. turns out he was stalkin you! hahaha. my, my dear greg. you can find denden a bf anytime but not any of uree freaky friends!. and not noww. maybe 6 mnths later or on my sweet sixteen?! suprisee me dear. but i dunno if you can comee cos u'll be busy ritee. miszin you dear.

xoxomee.

7:12:00 PM

its a sad world. ppl changee.

My bs aree upset cos ive been wearing "his" ring for sometime now and all ive said is "it just makes me feel happy." they think i shud just forget but i havee no clue why im feelin likee this. its funny how things can turn out not the way you planned it to. he has been sms'n me today and ive been smiling the whole day.

but other then dt i dont want to smilee cos its totally fakee.i really want him gone!. but i cant. Bs said i shud get someone moree better. but i dont want tooo. cos it hurts. he asked me a wholee lots of q's which i dunno where he gets his info frm "you've been reading my blog again ey?boy?."

i dont want anything to happen though. it was all planned and predicted "nothing good ever lasts". Greg called me yesterday and he was so sweet. i cudnt help but tell him how i feel. all he said was " denden dear. i guess its just a feeling. rememebr he didnt ever loved you back. so no use thinking abt him this way. if ever he has another or not. be happy for him cos you know him and ppl do things for the good. not the bad. be happy den, i lovee you so much kay. take care and ill hug you as soon as i get back. forget him. you need me. im here for you. always uree beloved bro ritee?." hahaha. ok dt made me smilee lots. i misz greg loads!. and F.Y.I he's just my sexy bro. nothing moree.

ivee decided to keep the memories but lock em away. i've got to get this ring off my finger b4 the tears start to shed again. ivee said alot of nasty things b4 but i hopee its all forgiveen and forgotten. i didnt mean it. i was just really angry. wish you happy friend. =)

xoxomee.

6:23:00 PM

Lie to me baby. Once again.
Make me Believe!.

crapiola? sweet bums.
stupid lil me =) xoxo*ness.

2:00:00 AM

them*ness.

showering me with their problems. i feel so horrible. it makees me think of you&i. remember dear?.all thosee feelings . kept in my treasuree box. all dt sorrow drowned by music&rain. itss so upsetting to hear dt even the person dt givess great advicee cant helped themselves either (words from my kak).

kak is goin thru a rough timee. remembering when dt was me. i was lost and she hugged me& pulled me out of it. now, its my turn to help kak. but her sorrow is makin me remember and can i say havee me nearly in tears?. but i cant. i shudnt. i shud stop!. i misz you friend.

Babe also showering me wid her probs at the samee time. its abt her bad boy. and i feel how abt my bad boy?. well, what happen to him?. today he sms'd me and i smiled. the real smile showing again. but i still say "really smile? when was the last time you said 'i love you'??." i was feeling sick the whole day and i felt likee i wanted to hear him say " take lots of rest. drink lots of water. take care "honey". i dunno whats goin on wid me?. i cant lovee him. it may be lust. he didnt lovee me. but its just something i cant just shruge off. i dunno why . lust plays guilty conscience on you. hahaha something a lil someone oncee told me.

evrywhere i go flashes of our short memories pass me by. and i feel so horrid. i feel like givin him a call and say "hey, you? you doin fine?." but he mayb too busy . too busy with his lifee dt im no longer dt important anymoree. owgawd! here i go sounding likee we are still together. =)

i hoppe it will go well after i get rid of all his painful memories.

xoxomee.

1:37:00 AM

*note to self:

"dream on denden. he wont lovee you back. he never will. friends you are. deal with it!."

if he lovees someonelse then be happy denden. but if he doesnt, just be friends cos you kno dt he will never lovee you d way he did?. if ever he did.

you misz him. but dont turn miszin into lust then so-called- lovee. you aree happy remember? you said you've moved on. so stay likee dt.

babee, you oncee told me dt you hate guys who break hearts. cheat. lie and makee girls cry. i didnt know you turned out to be onee. its a feelin i cant stop but im sorry. you also said we arnt suited for eachother.
does dt hurt when you say it?. honestly babee. it did! " im holding on by letting go of you." its the letting go dts really hard.

ok. a convo wid my Bs. they putting some sense in my head. but im stubborn . ill understand one day. (* d highlighted in blue is a lil somethin to him.)

xoxomee.

12:08:00 AM

Friday, December 29, 2006Y

my 600+ testies. new clothes. teddy&i. bloggin.fone/pixs. jealous?. clubbin?.

hahahaha . ok i was suppose to writee one blog enrty for today cos i told aba and ibu i was goin to sleep.
but im actually trying on new clothes. bloggin. takin pixs. i gt 600 testies on frnster! yay!

teddy said he lovees me?! i punched teddy. he also said he needs me? im sorry teddy, im in "like?" wid you =).

my bs went clubbin and didnt even tell me! hahaha. they can call ser* but cant call me. some bs you are! hmph!. =) but no worrys. "we dancee best when we're drunk" ritee teddy x).

and this timee babe. im gonna makee you so drunk. you dont even rememebr my namee and dont remind me i have a bf. cos I DONT! hahaha.

im such a freakin mofo. i cant cross the road without help =) . hehehe i had to grab dt old freaky guy and cross.

oh my new yrs. celebratin it alonee at klcc?. i think i want to invitee my "friend". if he is not busy and if he is not at GH*. sigh. friends? i just dont want to be lonely. and uree the unlucky person im starting my new yr wid. honestly, i dream of you too. believe it or not. i dunno if its true you dream of mee? but it sounds believeable?! haha. ibu wants him to prove? i dunno provee what. and im suppose to laugh abt it.

moviess. i want to go cinema. i misz havin some strong broad shoulders to lean on! and i misz sexy body's and cutee butts to touch! haha. omg! knock me on the head and say " dumdum denden. movee on. stop dreamin". im such a loser. i still "dream". puhaha . movee on!

xoxomee.

11:33:00 PM

oh-so-sleepy. tution is such a boree.

had tution. tired. frm 7-10? haha.
talked to "him". he seems so sad. i feel so sorry.
i misz you dear friend.

xoxomee.

10:08:00 PM

Thursday, December 28, 2006Y

teddy's a freakin moron!

haha. he called me a slut and cried to mama teddy =).

recently my buds said im reall skinny? *coughbullshitcough*. My.my rub ure eyes a lil. wake up. cant you see dt elephant in the room x). i hatee it when aunts&uncles say "omg! your daughter is getting prettier evryday. does she havee a bf?". freaks! yes i havee a bf! get dt clue!. i dont want to be patched up with uree son!.

i was abt to curl my hair today. but i chicken'd out?! haha. i guess tumoro i will. i hatee straight hair?. but then again My hairs really long now. gonna dye it "lighter" brown. im not acting stupid. im just trying to be happy?. i hatee tinee* im gonna grill her!. greg is too in lovee.gonna break dt [x

i dont hatee you babee. i never will. remember: denden cant never hatee anyonee. unless you hatee me first for no reason.

babee, we go out soon. im freakin bored at homee. wanna watch a movie. walk in the park. cry on ure shoulder. burn my memories with you.

babee, den's not in lovee atleast not now!.

babee, i do admit i misz him. but i gt to get rid of him too.

babee, tell me how?. i always have been dissin' him. till i feel really sorry.

babee, i know its wrong. he did me wrong. but i misz/lust after him?.

Omg! babee dont cry. i misz you too but i misz him moree. babee, is this really goodbye..??

babee, pleez dont get mad babee. i need him!

"lie to me again babee. i want to believe. i need you."

xoxomee

OH PS: my little convo wid my babee. baby. i wrotee it down my own way cos my msn is Fcuked and its hard to coppy and pastee. x)

11:41:00 PM

boredom.

american pie rawks? likee so not! haha.
its naughty but nicee? . hahaha. i misz greg! keith! lud& andro!

My sweet sixteen. singing.dancing.food."drinks". haha.
its gonna be awesome =)

teddy has issues. i hatee teddy. he hates me too.

teddy said something mean. i cried. teddy hit me. i toree off tedy legs.

xoxomee. =)

11:04:00 PM

boredom makees you writee notes =).

haha. red notes cant seee.

so truee.

well said. =)

truetrue.

remember the "firsts". wrapped and kept away.

so hush!.

xoxomee.

10:20:00 PM

it always ends with a "ring".

haha. Ow my. havee been out whole day. tinee* not talking. greg wondering why. but no worries i told greg to enjoy in philippines =). bought lots of things for mei. and myself =) see meimei. i think of you x)

im bored. it always ends with a "ring" now kak understands haha. told you so! kak?!.
ibu keeps on talkin abt him. its pissing me off and she's makin me rememebr =)

" lie to me again baby. make me believe. i need you. its not love. i just lust for you" =)

im so bored. lonely but happy? hehe.

xoxomee.

9:55:00 PM

ok. enuf drama for the day.

ill choose to forget this cos its not worth thinkin of.
im just angry . dont push it.

xoxomee.

12:08:00 AM

Wednesday, December 27, 2006Y

21 people name...
Can you name 21 people you can think of right off the top of your head? Dont read the questions underneath until you write the names of all 21 people. This is a lot funnier if you actually list the names first!! No cheating!!!

1. Rhea
2. ser*
3. nilu
4. ben
5. greg
6. nat
7. seng
8. Picha
9. ky-mi
10. illisa
11. susu
12. jega
13. laarnia
14. joon hee
15. shi*
16. weeton
17. lia
18. keith
19. andro
20. lud
21. kc

1. How did you meet 10?
* school? introduced by adik larn.

2. What would you do if you had never met 6?
* haha mei? wait till i do meet her. =)

3. Have you ever seen 4 cry?
* yeps and it was freakin hilarious.

4. Would 11 and 12 make a good couple?
* haha ofcos they will. they already are. =)

5. Would number 1 and 2 make a good couple? -
* haha. wud they?.

. Describe 8:
* all minee. big.proud.loud abang [:

7. Do you like 7?
* ofcos i do. nini is mei's babee.

8. Tell me something about 17?
* My crazie bestie.

9. What's 12's favorite color?
* blue?

10. What would you do if 1 just confessed they liked you?
* i kno. we started the bs anyway. x)

11. When was the last time you talked to number 19?
* yesterday. at a party.

12. What grade is 16 in?
* yr 11?.

13. What is 5's favorite music?
* pop rock. haha our fav =)

14. what's 20's last name
* medrano.

15. Would you ever want to be in a serious relationship with 15?
* wud i?.

16. where does 3 live?
* err. bukit antara.

18. What do you think about 18?
* my flirty babee.

19. What is the best thing about 11?
* My jie so helpful!!

20. What would you like to tell 14 now?
* clubbin lets go. bro!.

21. How did you meet 9?
* new girl in school. hi and bye. sistas we are. =)

22. What is the best thing about 12?
* crazie. funny and oh-so-loyal.

23. Are you going to know 20 forever?
* yep.

24. What it is about 2?
* my babee. haha.

25. Is there something between you and 1 ?
* besties we are =).

26. Will you ever date 5?
* haha. with tinee in the way?. no.

27. Describe 9?
* spoilt.crazie.oh-so-amazing. shes gt gr8 music taste. and i lovee her pixs =).

28. what does 8 like?
* football.

29. who is 13 to you?
* aww my adik. haha.

xoxomee.

11:47:00 PM

Oh PS tinee:

DONT GO AND TELL PPL ABT DIZ COS I GT MY WAYS TO BREAK YOU!
THINK ABT DIZ "BYE BYE GREG!". HAHA! REMEMBER THE PROMISE I MADE WITH HIM?
ITS STILL ON AND THE ONLY ONE KEEPING US AWAY FRM EACHOTHER IS SKINNY LITTLE YOU! SO FUDGE OFF AND SOW DT DELICATE MOUTH OF URES.

xoxomee.

11:03:00 PM

Omg.

Christine uree so full of it! and uree really fast.

Love in the air: Bitch! is this your idea of blackmail.

[deE]* : YES, ASS! and im not a bitch. i just dislikee you. =)

Love in the air: But!but! why greg?!

[deE]* : who you think?. abdul? haha one night stand my as*!

Love in the air: i don't care if you love greg or he is your bro. i love him more.

[deE]* : REALLY? you do? lets view the pixs and video. shall we?.

Love in the air: oh so you want it tht way ey?. fine! lets go to your idiotic ex and say "something" shall we?.

[deE]* : puhahaha. One things for suree. he dont know you. leavee him out of this. its between you&i.

Love in the air: you told me when you got drunk you still love him? typical bitchy denden. i love it when you're drunk you tell me things i should know :)...

[deE]* : haha. my.my tinee you do ure hmwk. Omg! greg just came onlinee. and so what if i still do lovee him? he dont lovee me back so i rather forget him! and i will and i can. you wanna bet? huh bitch!?

Love in the air: yeh! you are so good at pretending Mofo. i don't believe you.

[deE]* : so dont! bitch. cos gregs onlinee and i can just say it and show it anytime.

Love in the air: .........

[deE]* : out of words tinee?. haha likee i said "im not mean. i just get even!".

Love in the air: :( Fine dee i give in. i'll just shut it But erase tht shit on your blog. Greg will see.

[deE]* : good! but i wont cos i refuse to tear a page out of my "diary".

[deE]* : aint this fun bitch?! haha. My ex is just my ex. he dont lovee me back so what?! but you and greg. usee him you will. i feel so fuckin bad for him. soon if he gets all upset again ill break you. and my trustable gang will make sure you're completely broken.

Love in the air: .... now i know why your ex broke up with you. your freak'in scary and cuz he loves another?. does he? thts what "they" tell me.

[deE]* : OMG! TEST MY PATIENCE! DTS NOT THE REASON. BITCH! YOU SUCK!!!!!!! HE LOVEES ANOTHER? SHUT UP! HE DOESNT. BEST OF FRIENDS THEY ARE. AND F.Y.I DONT TALK BAD ABT MY FRIENDS LIKE DT COS YOUR FRIENDS ARE NO BETTER. THEY ONLY KNOW HOW TO GO BOY SHOPPING AND GET THEMSELVES LAID?! YES. ATLEAST MY FRIENDS HAVE LIMITS. AND DONT TALK ABT MI* DT WAY COS SHE AINT LIKE DT! NOW I KNOW YOU ARE THE ONE SENDING DT FRNSTER MSG AND SMS? ARE YOU!? BITCH! GROW UP. YOU DONT EVEN KNOW THEM! I REFUSE TO LISTEN TO YOU BITCH!.YOU ONLY HEAR IT FROM OTHER PPL. AND I GUESS YOU DONT EVEN KNOW HALF OF WHO YOU TALKED TOO COS YOU WERE TOO FREAKIN DRUNK EH?

Love in the air: woa! woa! dee cool down and you dont talk about MY FRIENDS like tht cuz they aint. im sorry if i offended you it was just to shut you up.

[deE]* : shut me up? haha. typical? you wont! and ill start something. i will! and i dont take ure filthy sorries cos it dont mean anything you just love to say it so we wud just be the best of friends again? and for the sake of greg?. No you leave greg alone sick bitch!. like i said he comes to me all upset abt you again. the truth is gonna be revealed. bitch! go to hell. Oh ps. its on.
*i go offline*.

haha my crazie little convo wid my worst enemy?. Fudge off!. don't bother greg cos ill make him not love you. and sorry mi* if you read this and see uree namee init?. cos my buddie is a sick bitch! and she gt he gang of untrustable bitches to get stupid info. sorry.

xoxomee.

10:08:00 PM

bored

i misz mak lia. kak? di mana kau pergi mak? saya rindumu? haha.
saya benci cuti sekolah!. rindu kawan saya.

i shud stop wid my freakin malay. hehe.
i wudnt be suprisee.eh! enuf with this stupid sms's.
i dont givee a fudgee. just Grow up. get a clue. i dont care you freakin fool.

and stop it! whatever happens. its not my problem.
i can only listen and say "oh ok" x)

im not dt kinda mean person dt will causee moree drama. i just likee to watch the drama =).
so plz dont push my patience to the limits cos i really don't caree anymoree.
oh! and for the record asses. im not a bitch. i just dislikee you.

yesyes call me names and shit but "pleez will the real bitch. plz stand up. plz stand up." ass!.
get dt?. hahaha. im so mean. Oh! so no one wud causee another drama here. Christinee. Yes! im talkin abt you. you go and Fudge ure freakin bf for all i caree. and he talked to me cause he wanted to know wth was up wid you. there is nothin goin on. but if you want it tht way. its on ass! oh. yes tell my mom abt wht we did?! ok go ahead. she knows uree dirty little secret bitch. and its worse den "ours". Pussy go cry to greg for this shit. i dont caree cos my buddie will always listen to me. and i can turn him against you anytime. remember abdul?. yes, i havent forgotten. I WAS THERE. i saw "it" with my own 2 eyes. the pixs?the video? its all here. you want to see!. you can watch it with greg bitch. im suree he'll lovee to watch it too.
Clubbin' adventuree? bitch its off. new yrs im not goin wid a immaturee ass like you. id rather go to klcc with my single self and watch firee works. dont forcee uree freaky friend on me cos i dont want him!. Guys aree untrustable and unpredictable anyway.

Oh ps. greg. and i havee been friends sincee we were wee babees. so don't think you can pull any fcuked up tricks up uree skinny ass sleeves. i know. ive gt eyes evrywhere. *Muakz* kisz thiz.. you ass!. Oh and uree freaky friends?. ask them to fudge off. its greg.me and my trustable gang against you and uree 5 star band of bitches. haha skinny ass!.

xoxomee.

9:31:00 PM

pieces of me.

"fall with you i fall so fast. i cant hardly catch my breathe."
" i lovee how you can tear. the pieces of me."
Tehehe. i just likee diz part.

avi lav really rawks my world.

"its the first time iv'e ever felt this lonely
i wish someone cure this pain.
Its funny when you think its gonna work out
Til you chose *weed?* over me, you're so lame

I thought you were cool until the point
But up until the point you didnt call me
When you said you would
I finally figured out youre all the same
Always coming up with some kind of story

Everytime I try to make you smile
You're always feeling sorry for yourself
Everytime I try to make you laugh
You can't
Youre too tough
You think you're the best
Is it too much that I'm asking for?

I thought you'd come around when I ignored you
So I thought you'd have the decency to change
But babe, I guess you didn't take that warning
'Cause I'm not about to look at your face again

Can't you see that you lie to yourself
You can't see the world through a mirror
It wont be too late when the smoke clears
'Cause I, I am still here
is that too much im asking for?

Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Can't find where I am
Lying here
Alone I fear
Afraid of the dark
No one to claim
Alone again.


yes avi really rawks.

i read all my past bloggings and i just laughed myself till i cudnt anymoree.
its so weird someone sent me a frnster msg and sms. frm anonymous?.

stating:

"you should know. you've been betrayed. dont trust tht person. im telling you, u'll be suprised.
its just a warning. i know you don't care but you should just know."

i was abit wondering cos this freak deleted its frnster? and well just send a sms frm a private no so i cant call back.weird*ness. as*es. im just wondering what will it be dt will suprisee me. don't trust?. don't trust who?. im still blur and ill find out soon. =) Gossips tingle x).

xoxomee.

7:59:00 PM

i so lovee my little meimei.

mei is such a sweetie. i lovee her =).

news.news. i hear news. hahaha
gossips tingle =). but i dont givee a fudge though.
its ok. back to school ill see abt it?.
mei&her nini. hahaha. she making me misz having someone arnd.
well, not someone so "shallow" and someone so "immaturee" but i want my punkie-skater boy =)
puhaha. besidess, i dont need anyone now. im just lusting over them x)

im gonna burn your bullshit.all ure lies and memories.
or shud i givee it to ure next gf?. if ever u have any. puhahaha...
im not mean. i just get even?.
the internet is so fudging slow. My.My.my im getting piszed off![:

and again all you annoying as*es out there. Im OK! i am not angry. im happy. im not tht little pussy dt cries over a damn fool for longg. haha not worth crying over. as*es!. babes. lets go out!. im so freakin bored at homee.

i need to dancedance and go high up in the sky.

Oh and ps: don't tell me not to change and still be the girl you "once" knew three months ago. cos tht girl is long gone. she is one her way down dt lonely road to happiness? haha. and the new improvee "cudnt careless" bitch's up and running. wish you happy idiot. i wudnt be suprisee. liar.

ivee also heard "ppl" has been talkin abt my blog?. Quit it!. its my blog. my lifee. i writee what i want and you just shut it and read! thanks. anything else to say? im up for it. but i cudnt careless. as*es.

xoxomee.

7:30:00 PM

thinking.

wokee up at 12 today.still really sleepy. why am i waking so latee nowadays. gt me thinking cos i keep on havin "weird" dreams. 2007 is comin real soon. and dt timee im brainwashin myself =).

memories. err i need some help to get rid of them.
"their" gifts. letters.memories. Goodbye?.forever?. haha.
2007 ill burn them. you burn my pink book. ill burn you freakin things too.
you keep my memories?. i burn yours instead. uree cutee blue/red bracelet?fancy earings?.rings?. bye bye baby. i dont want them. but im polluting the air. i think i shud just givee it away. it always ends with a "ring".
dts how lovees f-ed up and it hurts. "first lovee" Utada. Yes dt was u baby. but itss ok. im finee on my own =). wish you happy.

scary dreams. OH yea! i had a dream abt o.b. haha it all started in a mall. he said hi. i ignored. he ran after me. i realized he was wid someone. i laughed at him. he smiled at me. we three went for lunch. it was fun. you then walked away with your "smile" and your cutee way of saying bye. dreams dt i want to forget. i woke up. luked at my fonee. a msg frm you. Omg!. just cos you were upset and needed help. *sigh* then again. i shudnt. but im just too kind. im not angry. i just don't want to remember you. friends we are?. but not too close.sorry. Moved on. happy!. no moree you. bye bye baby [:

My friends say im just acting too stupid and I shudnt do dt. But all for the sake of forgetting him. Im not acting stupid. I havee the right to do what I want too. And if you don’t like it. So be it. Ill just forget you too. Oh and besides, remember we going to burn all our 2006 memories on new yrs eve?. Ah. Don’t forget. Now I hatee ppl who linked my blog. My privatee blog is goin out! Hahaha.

xoxomee.

1:02:00 PM

Tuesday, December 26, 2006Y

Omg! cinderella story. Lizzie Mcguire movie. haha

told you ive gonee retro?! puhaha. blast frm the past. Ibu is proud cos im growin up.
we were talkin abt "him" and she just cudnt stop laughing. i cudnt too. besides, den dont need anyone im happy on my own =). ibu was asking me abt "whether i misz o.b or not?" and ofcos i dont. hehe im finee on my own remember?. besides i dont need him.her.them. cos ivee gt my trusted friends by myside. [dont go all gaga dear. your part of my trusted friends] puhaha. My buddies havee gonee overseas and i feel really stupid for deleting dt video. sorry buddie.

Omg! lizzie mc guire soundtrack . i likeee. and all dt avi lav. Omg skater boy! hahaha..
"im not afraid of happy endings. it just doesnt go dt way."

i laughed my head off thinking of "o.b" and his stupid memories. all his gifts aree in my treasuree case but im gonna throw it or givee it away cos its not worth lookin at. " you dont want to talk to me finee! cos im not d first person you wud always go too. unless you need help. i shudn't but im just too kind".

ashlee simpson. pieces of mee. yes now dts my song? haha.

xoxomee.

10:00:00 PM

My world record?.

trying to makee a record for most "blog posts" in one day. [:

i know.i know.i know. im retarded! xp. My rooms a mess. i do my bloggin' in abas "privatee" room.
haha. guys are really untrustable& unpredictable. jo knows how i feel now. we both aree "guy" haters. her boy is such a freakin toy?. i feel likee breaking him in three (o.b).

listening to Avi Lav. she rawks haha. her music totally matches my life =).
schools abt to start soon?. but i dont wanna go. i want to go sayfol.
ibu says dt if "fatty" retains me?. im transfering straight to sayfol. woohoo. bye past!ill catch you later. [:
in away i dont wanna go. miszing my Bs.My mei.My khor.my jie. evryone. lamee lamee mee.

weee. dont link mee! hahaha. my privatee blog is goin out :)

xoxomee.

10:00:00 PM

My Retro Fever.

haha. Bringing back the past?. Not "their" memories.Idiots.

i lovee old music! puhaha. (Music junkie). listening all of the 50s-99s haha.
memories of my dumb little self.
in lovee with Aaron carter's songs haha. My.My.my lamee mee =).

Sum 41. running up and down my mind?! hahaha. Jason Mccaslin. My hot.wanted.punkie-skater-boy. [:
i lovee boys with their toy guitars xp. their punkie hair. converse shoes. skater clothes. guys in black.white.brown.red. their "unique" piercings. all minee. x)

xoxomee.

9:46:00 PM

stupidity kills?. do i still care?.

haha. sitting infront of 2 comps. eating my Mee Goreng and "teh ais". (fattening. i kno).
listening to music on one and blogging on the other. listening to objection*go figure*.
i lovee my neww template. how does ppl kno i link them? haha weird*ness.

im getting annoyed with "unoriginal" Fudgers. i feel likee dipping them in hot choco? haha.

stupidity kills? haha. was thinking. forgetting. dont bother baby. cos im finee on my own.
its uree loss. not minee. i waited. you didnt come.

xoxomee.

9:28:00 PM

Up latee. Music playing in my head.

sum 41 my neww found lovee?.

hahaha. camee back so latee after a party. managed to stay sober!. =)
slept with mp3 playing. woke up listening to sum41. wokee up at 2pm.
MY neww lovees sum41. i think jason mccaslin*cone*& deryck whibley*bizzy D*
hott! puhaha. my Oh-so-punkie-skater?- boyys. i likee lovee =) all minee [:

well wokee up today wid a terrible headache. slept at 3am. wokee up at 2pm.
almost 12 hrs. "he" smsd' me. didnt say much. "and now u want to communicatee?. u gt a problem. but don't come asking me for help." im just too kind. i help btw. but nott too much.sorry dear. goodbyes really? forever.

xoxomee.

4:27:00 PM

My christmas. My childhood friends.

hahaha My chidhood buds. some of em.

i lovee em so much! haha. we laugh.cry.sing.get angry together.
what will i do without em.

spending christmas alone was ok. ofcos i don't need anyonee. im happy =)
Played bball. drank?!.ate. laughed till i cried.sing?.takee pixs?.videos.
i told em abt my "dramatic" lifee and My f-ed up ex(s). hehe [:
they gt pissed? no!! they laughed abt it. they called him " Orang bodoh. haha".
so now we call him "O.b" i lovee em so much!. haha. they wanted to call him?.
they want to go fairview and luk for him? hehe. i allow but for fun. they heard abt Gi*.
they say go for it. but i dont want cos im afraid and i dont want.
My flirty babee. hahaha holding hands?.hugging?.kissed?. nearly. yeh! Buddie. dont!.
i lovee you but no. hahaha oh! btw "flirty babee" my Oh-so-funny buddie. we havee been friends sincee d day we were born. i bullied him. he bullied me. we shared moments? haha. but still uree my bro.my babee.all minee.friends we aree? remember promises between eachother?. if one day no one gets "hitched" *winkwink* =). i lovee you. my christmas was the bomb! hahaha.. sadsad in 1 hrs time he goin to philippines. and the others are going to singaporee. im alonee again. haha No worries. =) i gt my bs and my deewee familee.

xoxomee.

3:09:00 AM

Monday, December 25, 2006Y

He wasn't what i want, what i thought now.
He would'nt even open up the door.
He never really make me feel like i was special.
He isn't really what im looking for.

like i was special?. cos i was special!.

i ~~love~~ hatee you.
~~i love the rain. makes me think of you.~~

~~"where did i go wrong? i lost a friend. somewhere along."~~
all your lies. Bullshit!

xoxomee.

2:33:00 PM

Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

And I've dropped out, I've burned up, I fought my way back from the dead
Tuned in, turned on, remembered the things that you said .

Greatest fan off you're life.

xoxomee.

1:18:00 PM

So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring
Nothing's quite the same now
I just say your name now

But it's not so bad
You're only the best I've ever had
You don't want me back
You're just the best I've ever had

So you stole my world
Now I'm just a phony
Remembering the boy
Leaves me down and lonely

Send it in a letter
Make yourself feel better

And it may take some time to
Patch me up inside
But I can't take it so I
Run away and hide
And I may find in time that
You were always right
You're always right

What was it you wanted
Could it be I'm haunted

But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
I don't want you back
You're just the best I ever had
The best I ever had
The best I ever

xoxomee.

1:09:00 PM

Its Christmas.

hahah. Finally! and im feeling sad? hahaha.. Noo..=) im happy. so what i dont havee a "somebody" to spend my christmas wid. haha i gt my lovely Friends. My lovely Abang.Kaks.Adiks. hahaha. all minee.

i wudnt trade anythin in the world for them or my family =)

Letting Go of both of you. Hush baby, i dont want to hear it.

i ~~lovee~~ hatee the rain. don't cross mee.

xoxomee.

11:05:00 AM

Sunday, December 24, 2006Y

. how cud you .

haha. boredom kills. mei is such a sweetie. its 11.20 a few mins till christmas.
ppl aree stealin my "xoxo*ness". i hate it. stop it!!. u were born original dont die a copycat!!.
mak lia and i aree so likee sisters. hahaha . we havee the samee prob. both bodoh kan? otak kosong ia? kak? hahaha. u tunggu i mari rumah kamu dan rogol adiknya. hahahaha my malay sucks.don't comment cos i kno =). hahaha. we both crazie . and bored! wee. i so lovee my mak lia. hehehe.. aba allows me to go clubbin'?? weird huh? but truee as long as Jo is dere. its ok. hehehe.. My few fav songs at the moment. how cud you. big girls dont cry. helenna. ill be ure crying shoulder. don't wanna try. hahaha.. all minee. =)

luk my pixs. Boredom really does kill!! =)

xoxomee.

11:20:00 PM

.: Boredom Really kills :.

the tag says it all.

"hubbys" memories. "honeys" memories.

hahaha.. i just lovee this.

My deewee family. =)

i took ure ring off. to ~~remind me~~ forget you.

dts meee.. hahaha..

xoxomee.

11:01:00 PM

rain. what rain?.

~~i lovee the rain. makes me think of you.~~

i ~~lovee~~ hatee the rain. dont cross mee.

xoxomee.

6:32:00 PM

. i lovee my friends. they makee me smilee.

church today. hahaha singing and dancing. yes, my kinda thing.

i go by the name "music junkie" hahaha.
i was called spoilt brat but i take it as a compliment.
"he" sms'd me it did impress me. made me feel better. but im sorry trust is nomore there.
you mayb lying to mee. what i hate was when u said " we dont suit eachother". and when i called you
"doggy" for fun cos she does. u gt angry and wish not to speak to me anymoree.
hahaha typical. i dont really caree though. wish you happy.

im letting go of him. and you. i dont want to waste my timee. next yr im starting new.
im gonna forget my "fucked" up past and Grow up!. crying overr both of you is a waste of timee.
hahah. crying over someone so shallow and someone so "immature" . yesyes. Both of you shud GROW UP!.
im movin on.

"don't waste ure time on me. ure already a voicee inside my head".

i havee been constantly singing "big girls don't cry". hahaha my familys getting irritated.
[a part taken]

"I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, myself and I
We got some straightening out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've gotta get a move on with my life
It's time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry."

Hmm.. i guess dts my theme noww. im so sick of freakin lovee songs. im starting to hate the word "lovee"
i dislikee ppl who are inlove. but i find it cutee =). im not mean i just get even hahaha.

eventually one day ill forget you all. doing my o-levels and getting the fudge outta here. hehehe..
im gonna misz my lil sis nat. i thank her alot and her nini* seng? hahaha. sweetsweet them and now i kno who my "true" friends really aree. my babes.my taikhor.my lil sis's haha. my lil bros. all mineee. its us against you?. mess wid one u mess wid all. hahaha. i ~~lovee~~ hatee the rain. don't cross mee.

xoxomee.

6:06:00 PM

Saturday, December 23, 2006Y

mee.

unpredictable you. my sad and lonely christmas *sniff*.
i hatee this. my first timee alone at christmas.

i need empty buckets cos here comes the tears. haha.
i dont neeed you. i dont need him. guys are so untrustable. unpredictable.

Loner. ill bee. happy for nilu* cos shes got her baby.
i hope lil sis knows what she's doin. i dont want to see her cry. ill break him in half. haha

unfaithful bugger. ill kill you!. haha.

xoxomee.

10:48:00 PM

Im not donee yet. i never will. to be continued?.

likee i said. i havee the right to get angry. now this is how im letting go off you.

dont be so freakin immaturee. You lied. we cried. u cant change ure mistakes.
all words dt comee out frm ure mouth at this point is all BULLSHIT.

u dont need me or her. you just need to kill ureself. haha. Omg! im being mean again.
then again i was at the beach. staring at the waves.. feeling the wind against my skin. i thought of the "drama" and abt us 3. i thought abt what u said and ure painful memories. i cried. and dt was so stupid. cos crying bcos of you. is a waste of timee. dont try to suck up to us. ure cheesy pick up linees don't work!.

well, ill make it not work for you. i pity the next girl you go for. she will fall for all ure bullshit and maybe ill be the onee to savee her and givee u a slap. take us on a ridee you will. but break us. u wont. i guess you lied to us cos u wanted us to hatee eachother??. u thought u cud get away frm it all? No loser. we are smarter then u are. or maybe u just didnt want us to get hurt. im sorry to say DEAR. we did. i dont speak for myself cos i feel for her too. and ure not toying wid onee. but two.

you may say. you are right and its not your fault. Bullshit. lifee ruiner. uree lame excuses. stupid pick up lines. Fuck you. i dont caree if you read this . u shud know!. i want you to know. i hate myself for losing him. i hate myself for fallin for you.

and then again. dont ask uree freaky friends to tell me not to be sad or angry. i dont agree wid her. nothing is her fault. she is just another mee dt fell for stupid you!. besidess ITS ALL URE FAULT! YOU TO BE BLAMED. YOU NEED TO GET HURT. U NEED TO GROW UP. U NEED TO GET A LIFEE. YOU NEED TO FUCK OFF!. its not. me.me.ME.not her.her.HER. but you.you.YOU!.

PS: Oh and those freaks dt lovee to judge a book by its cover. Quit it! i dont think u even know how to read huh?. dont send stupid testies dt seems so rude. dont givee f-ed up comments and dont send messages if you don't know wth u are saying. i support her all the way and i dont think shes wrong. eventhough something has been donee but i dont blamee her. i blamee you!. i always will blamee you!.

get moree tangled in ure web dear. dont tend to create a new one cos u'll fall when uree makin it.
go get ure immatured ass up. change. get a life. fuck off and Grow up. Go cry to uree important person. dont tell me abt it . hush now dear cos i dont want to hear it!.

xoxomee.

6:35:00 PM

Back frm my hollie break.

hahah mee back. went onlinee. first person to say hi too. lil sis. haha

"Anti-tucker". if he does anything i swear ill break him. enufs said. u hurt her. goo die!.
honestly. i even feel Gi* is up to something. something tucker told him?! i dunno guys aree just so unpredictable and untrustable.

Oh back to my holi. went shoppin 2 days. stayed in the hotel 1 day. it was nicee actually. bikinis. beach. wind. waves. haha. got me thinking and not to mention cry? haha. i told myself to let go of you. and him. i will and i must. start neww. next yrr.

i cant stop but say how much i hate you!!. all ure lies? i dunno how did i put up to em. i did so much and to find out u were a such Loser!!. so shallow.narror minded. and afraid? lonely?! ill makee you!!. go find someone else. and leavee her and i alonee. Better yet takee uree fucked up lifee and go cry to ure "important person" . i dont need you. neither will i regret cos ure such a stupid mistakee. if only i didnt. my stupidity wudnt kill. i lost the one i really loved and now im crying over my mistakes. all becos off you.

No!. dont ask uree freaky friends to tell me not to be sad or angry. i havee the right. and don't changee the Fudging story cos u ended it and i just refused to repeat it. its not me.me.ME. its you.you.YOU!

i guess you read my blog too. Get this clue. i Fucking hatee you. hatee mee too? i didnt do anything to you. but love you too much. go ahead. get drunk!. go find a "buddie*" to forfill ure needs as if i dont kno. you said it when we were still together. well didnt tell me but told someone. " lets go to bali and find a "buddie". how wud she know she's all the way back in kl." yesyes. all YOU. haha oncee again dont ask ure friends to tell me not to be sad or angry. uree such a loser. GROW UP!.

ending by saying. im letting go of you. i hatee the rain. dont cross mee.

xoxomee.

5:33:00 PM

Wednesday, December 20, 2006Y

holiday boredom.

sitin in hotel room. bored to death!.
aba got the net workin for me cos i was complaining.

today's abas birthday =). me and anggi are chatty buddies noww.
he's all the way in bali and he bought a new no for mee? hahah.

*note to self: not noww. just friends. "anti-tucker".im happy. im movin on.
forget his lies.

i misz "him". but try forget himm too.. theres no chancee. " too fall in lovee it takes an instant. letting go. now dt takes timee".

shoppin later. its raining and im smiling? haha.

ok now i gotta ask lil sis to knock me on the head and say " no chancee. learn your lesson." haha. i studied abit yesterday. today gotta do my acc. yesyes. i bring my school books on my holiday. =)

hotties evrywhere. but im controllin myself? haha..

xoxomee.

9:53:00 AM

Tuesday, December 19, 2006Y

My last blog entry.

gotta sleep . tumoro a trip too penang!! x).

will be gonee for 4 days. so 4 days not blogging torturee. haha.

Gotta buy my extra special ppl. extra special gifts.

i wont forget and lil sis. when im gonee remember "anti-tucker".
hahaha. *muakz*

till then x) =)

xoxomee.

12:59:00 AM

Monday, December 18, 2006Y

*sigh*
i lovee my lil sis x).

ok it seems i cant havee him. no worries . i wont stalk you. but ill just admire you frm afar. dreaming the day when ill get you back?. maybe i will. mayb i wont.

remember the crazie things we wud do?run arnd school laughing our heads off. holding eachother at the corridors? backs facing the walls. legs crossed between eachothers. throwing paperss down the "belcony". yesyes. my memories.. lost.gonee.endded. my stupidity kills. but its a lesson learnt. sometimes i forget and wish to shout out " honey!. when i miszed you " remember the benches? the stupid pix takings.

remember ser* hse?
her cozy room? yes baby. the all timee memory.ive just come to realize you've done alot for me and me the little loserr spoilt evrythin for you. im so sorry. i hopee the hatee and anger goess . i dont want this tension anymoree. fake smiles all the way baby. till you reveal my real smilee.

you havee all the ritee baby. and im so wrong. hope dt nobody has ure heart cos i want it back. remember the first letter u gavee mee? "bloody letter" i called it. u cutt ureself and wrote there " i love you" and drew a heart. dt comess to show baby u were all minee. Taikhor is ritee i deserve this. its my fault and ill deal with it. remember the cinema? the movie was so boring i fell asleep . you so kind but to hug me the wholee way. never watching the movie but watching eachother?

with you i never faked evry moment but with him..i tried too lovee him. i did lovee him so much. but it wasnt the samee. not anymoree. lifee's a bitch sometimes. but i havee too. i need too!. i cant but i must. im strong. ill go on. i dont mind you. i dont mind admiring you frm afar. i dont mind anything just as you stop ignoring me. *sigh*

my stupidity kills.

xoxomee.

6:07:00 PM

My chatty convo. Thinking. Confessions.Hatred.

after my chatty convo. it made me think. love you sis! ure the best.
im gonna finish my blogger off with my distant stories abt "him".

my confessions. i admit i was dumb. "i still wear you ring to remind me of what use to be".
the ring with the letter "M" on it. it was hard pretending. and im not going to pretend anymoree.

"i love the rain. makes me think of you. thunder makes it extra special."

Gonna learn how to lovee the rain again. just to think of you. sis said she wud loved to see us together.
Yes, sis i admit it too. Too much pain and sorrow in my heart. i want to let it go but i cant. i want to admit but i know ull hatee me moree. My stupidity kills!. but i know i wont be able to havee you again. not even for a short while. Your heart will belong to someone else soon and all ill do is watch you frm afar. sheding tears in my heart. haha its freaky dt the song " baby come back to me is playing now." and "photo. Baby. your fotos are my memories." My undying love for you grows moree and moree eachday. i smack myself on the head saying "dumdum denden". they say absence makes the heart grow fonder. yes its so truee. but in my casee this absence will be here forever. fake smiles all the way baby. im trying. if you allow me to havee your heart again. rememeber our promises? yes, these promises are meant to be kept cos they never were broken. till today. i can wait for you! ill be patient. ill be here for you no matter what. just to hear you say "honey". my heart will relieve and tht hidden "smile" will be back. but now ill just grieve in my stupidity. hopee for a miracle and christmas wish and wish for next yr. "Have you again Baby." its my fault. my pricee i havee to pay.

ending with "my stupidity kills!" and "i love the rain. makes me think of you. thunder makes it extra special."

xoxomee.

2:24:00 AM

Sunday, December 17, 2006Y

a misunderstanding cleared.

friends. sisters. we be.

ok me and K*mi . cleared something out. we dont hatee eachother.
crazie spoilt bratty sisters we are! money wasters. family haters.

she and her crazie convo. made me smile. haha thanks friends! she helped me moree. but i still lovee you bunch!. sorry for the recent blog sis . it aint you k!?. haha..

chattin and chattin frm 10 till now! its just full of funn and suprises.
( yes, sis now u kno my secrets)

and frm now own no hiding anythin frm eachother. no more lies.
no more tears baby. its time to movee on.

You see.. love you lil sis.!!

xoxomee.

Ps: remember what we havee to do x).

11:38:00 PM

???

my blog? someones reading?

Ps: its not you. don't jump to conclusions.

10:08:00 PM

shoppin.tears.painful memories.

went shoppin wid my family. bought alot of clothes till aba called me a shopaholic and Money waster.
" the things i do just to forget you. " and guess where i was? .

Midvalley. painful memories. You happy now Oh-so-"important person". the reason for my down fall was you. losing my apetite. friends don't amuse me anymoree. i want to go out but i hate the places i go too. my blogger is pissing me off. friendster is so fucking boring. i need something extra. i need to danceedancee and get drunk. i remember you saying you hatee girls who are skinny? Yes, my dear dts my main goal! and wish for christmas. i hatee looking at myself in the mirror. i feel so stupid. i ran away. i tried to get away. but i can't evry mile i take u'll be standing at the end. miszing you so much friend. it really is the end.

drowning my brokenheart with sorrow and tears. it obviously aint WORKIN!.

"Please don’t call me baby, don’t call me anymore
Please don’t worry about me, I’m fine on my own
Please leave me alone, all I want to do now is sleep in peace
Please don’t love me baby, because from tomorrow I’m on my own."

John tucker DESERVES to die. My bs are upset. the don't think im wrong. the want to whack him but i say NO! taikhor is even moree upset. 2nd timee he said. but i told him dont!. its between me&him. he kept on
cursing. he said " he wishes Venus loses! fuck venus! fuck the new captain!" puhaha i had to cool him down. i lovee them friends. i love taikhor. alway there. "friends are forever boys are never." it seems someone is so desperate? u happy now?! i think dt it was you? im not suprise. typical "feelings". i cant wait to get out of k.L. i dont wish to ever come back. i CANT WAIT TO GRADUATE!! get out off this fucking school. now i know how he feels "yes friend. KARMA!. you rawk my world!". when i did it to him. it came ritee back to me. my self confidence is goin down. im being a bitch!. i shouted at many ppl. just releasing my anger on them bcos of you. FUCK the RAIN! i hate it!. i cant hate you cos i simply lovee you too much. what wud you do if i cried? wud you cheer me up?. how abt died?wud you attend my funeral?. if i fell down? wud you pick me up?. if i told you not to lovee me. wud you?. i say yes to the above and no to the last one. i cant. i wont. i need you. but you dont!. don't talk to me baby cos i don't want to hear it.

1 wk out of town. how am i too writee down my feelings?. i thnk ill go Gaga by the end off the trip. fake smiles all the way baby. dts what its gonna be. and lastly i think someones too desperate. Grow up! get a lifee. but takee it. its yours now.

xoxomee.

8:13:00 PM